Why NeilsNotes?!

Butt-covering LEGAL crap! / IN SHORT: you are at least 18-years old (21-years old where 18 is not the age of majority), etc. etc. etc.

Terms of Use (NeilsNotes.com Inc.’s Website):

Eligibility:
You must be eighteen or over to ENTER and/or VIEW this site. By using and/or viewing this site, you represent and warrant that you have the right, authority, and capacity to enter into this agreement and to abide by all of the terms and conditions of this agreement and that you are at least 18-years old (21-years old where 18 is not the age of majority) - who are interested in and wish to have access to visual images, verbal and written descriptions and audio sounds of a sexually oriented, and frankly erotic nature. The materials, which are available within this site may include graphic visual depictions and descriptions of nudity and sexual activity and should not be accessed by anyone who is younger than 18-years old (21-years old where 18 is not the age of majority) or who is offended by such materials or who does not wish to be exposed to such materials. Commercially available parental control protections (such as computer hardware, software, or filtering services) may assist you in limiting access to material that is harmful to minors. If you are interested in learning more about these protections, information is available at www.cybersitter.com, www.netnanny.com or other analogous sites providing information on such protections. (The preceding links are provided for information purposes only and is not intended as an endorsement of these entities, their services, or policies. NeilsNotes.com Inc. is not affiliated with them.)

By using and/or viewing this site you represent and warrant under penalty of perjury the following:

A) That you are an adult, at least 18-years of age (21-years old where 18 is not the age of majority).
B) That you will not permit any person(s) under 18-years of age (21-years old where 18 is not the age of majority) to have access to any of the materials contained within this Site, including sending NeilsNotes.com Inc's Cards to persons under 18-years of age (21-years old where 18 is not the age of majority).
C) That you understand that when you gain access to this site, you will be exposed to visual images, verbal descriptions and audio sounds of a sexually oriented, frankly erotic nature, which may include (but not limited to:) graphic visual depictions and descriptions of nudity and sexual activity. You are voluntarily choosing to do so, because you want to view, read and/or hear the various materials which are available, for your own personal enjoyment, information and/or education. Your choice is a manifestation of your interest in sexual matters which, you believe, is both healthy and normal and which, in your experience, is generally shared by average adults in your community. You further represent and warrant that you are familiar with the standards in your community regarding the acceptance of such sexually oriented materials, and the materials you expect to encounter are within those standards. In your judgment, the average adult in your community accepts the consumption of such materials by willing adults in circumstances such as this which offer reasonable/effective insulation from the materials for minors and unwilling adults, and will not find such materials to appeal to a prurient interest or to be patently offensive.
D) That you further represent and warrant that you have not notified any governmental agency, including any postal service which you do not wish to receive sexually oriented material.
E) That you represent and warrant that you have not and will not use and/or view the Site(s) in a restricted location - namely a place, country, or location in which doing so would, or could be deemed a violation of any law, regulation, rule, ordinance, edict or custom.

Limitations of Liability; Indemnity
IN NO EVENT SHALL NeilsNotes.com Inc. BE LIABLE FOR ANY DIRECT, SPECIAL, INDIRECT OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES, OR ANY OTHER DAMAGES OF ANY KIND, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO LOSS OF USE, LOSS OF PROFITS, OR LOSS OF DATA, WHETHER IN AN ACTION IN CONTRACT, TORT (INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO NEGLIGENCE), OR OTHERWISE, ARISING OUT OF OR IN ANY WAY CONNECTED WITH THE USE OF OUR WEBSITES OR THE MATERIALS CONTAINED IN, OR ACCESSED THROUGH, OUR WEBSITES. You agree to defend, indemnify and hold harmless NeilsNotes.com Inc. and its affiliates and their respective officers, directors, employees and agents from and against any liabilities, losses, costs, claims, expenses, damages, causes of action or demands, including without limitation reasonable legal and accounting fees, arising or resulting, or alleged by a third party to be arising or resulting from your use of any information or material from our website(s) or your breach of any of these Terms of Use. The provisions of this paragraph shall indefinitely survive the termination of this agreement.

Applicable Law
These Terms of Use shall be governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of the Province of Alberta, applicable to agreements made and entirely to be performed within such province, without resort to its conflict of law provisions. By accessing and/or placing orders under our websites, you acknowledge that you have read, understood and agreed to be bound by these Terms of Use and by all applicable laws and regulations, including Canadian export control laws and regulations. Visitors who do not agree with these Terms of Use should not access or place orders through our websites. You agree that any action at law or in equity arising out of or relating to these Terms of Use shall be filed only in the Province of Alberta located in Provincial or Federal Court and you hereby irrevocably and unconditionally consent and submit to the exclusive jurisdiction of such courts over any suit, action or proceeding arising out of these Terms of Use.

By ordering NeilsNotes.com Inc.’s greeting cards, NeilsNotes.com Inc. may use your email address to contact you regarding: new product releases, special offers, etc. This is not to be considered by you (and will not be considered by you) as 'spam.' Your email address will never be sold to any 3rd. party.

Termination
Notwithstanding any of these Terms of Use, NeilsNotes.com Inc. reserves the right, without notice and in its sole discretion, to terminate your license to use our websites, and to block or prevent future access to and use of our websites.

Severability
If any provision of these Terms of Use shall be deemed unlawful, void, or for any reason unenforceable, then that provision shall be deemed severable from these Terms of Use and shall not affect the validity and enforceability of any remaining provisions.

Miscellaneous
These Terms of Use apply exclusively to your access to, and use of, our websites and do not alter in any way the terms or conditions of any other agreement you may have with NeilsNotes.com Inc. for products, services or otherwise. NeilsNotes.com Inc. reserves the right to change any and all content contained on our websites and the designs of the cards themselves at any time without notice. Reference to any products, services, processes, or other information, by trade name, trademark, manufacturer, supplier, or otherwise does not constitute or imply endorsement, sponsorship or recommendation thereof by NeilsNotes.com Inc.

Disclaimer
OUR WEBSITES AND THE MATERIALS ON OUR WEBSITES ARE PROVIDED ON AN "AS IS" AND "AS AVAILABLE" BASIS WITHOUT WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED. NeilsNotes.com Inc. DISCLAIMS ALL WARRANTIES, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, TITLE, AND NON-INFRINGEMENT. NeilsNotes.com Inc. DOES NOT REPRESENT OR WARRANT THAT MATERIALS IN OUR WEBSITES ARE ACCURATE, COMPLETE, RELIABLE, CURRENT, OR ERROR-FREE. NeilsNotes.com Inc. DOES NOT REPRESENT OR WARRANT THAT OUR WEBSITES OR ITS SERVER(S) IS FREE OF VIRUSES OR OTHER HARMFUL COMPONENTS.